And Now for a Non-Musical Interlude: How To Stay Properly Warm in Winter

Who Took This Awesome Picture?

Please answer "yes" or "no" to the following questions:
1. Is there a need for shoes that are not flip-flops?
2. Do you get enough Vitamin D?
3. Would you, if you could, cozy up to a roaring fire mid-May?
4. Is it important to wear clothes lined with faux fur? 

Below are the correct answers for Boston:
1. Ten months out of the year, yes.
2. If by Vitamin D you mean Doritos, then yes.
3. There are times that, yes, I would. And I'm not ashamed.
4. I'm sorry, I couldn't hear you through my fuzzy hat.

If your answers are different, you might need to know How To Stay Properly Warm in Winter.

 1. Buy a proper coat. We aren't talking waterproof-but-uninsulated. We aren't even talking waist-length. Anything that could, in any context, be described as a "jacket" will not cut it. We need high-tech, insulation-filled, waterproof, knee-length, hooded coat. To save money, you can buy a real winter coat either a) in a warm climate (they are cheap where nobody needs them!) or b) in the off-season (summer sales!). As painful as it is to try on coats in June, just think about the angst you will save yourself in November when it starts rain-sleet-hailing. "But," you protest, "why should I buy a huge coat when I will only need it for a month or so?" HA! we say. This year, we were still wearing our coats in June.

2. Buy proper boots. Again, cute will not cut it. At a minimum, boots should be waterproofed and hit above the ankle. Something big enough to accommodate pants is good as well, since it's very unpleasant to spend all day walking around school with soaked bottoms to your pants. "But guys," I hear you saying, "can't I just avoid the big puddles?" No. We can't really explain why, and honestly, we don't want to think about it since it's warm outside right now, but the puddles will find you, and they will soak you. Also: traction. If you can avoid the slow, embarrassing fall where you hit hard on one hip and then proceed to slide down a hill in full view of all your neighbors, you should.

3. Buy texting gloves. Admittedly, texting gloves are not usually the most awesome of gloves, but they serve one important feature: you can keep your gloves on as you, shivering, check to see when the bus is coming. Sometimes, this is such a wonderful thing you may have to wipe a tear from your eye before it freezes on your cheek. But keep your gloves on for that too.

4. Buy a hat. This is slightly more open to interpretation, but we can tell you that tightly woven hats with brims are great for keeping the heavy snow from blinding you.  It will keep your hair dry. It will keep you from flying into a rage-coma when a chunk of snow, wet and heavy, falls from the roof of a bus stop and onto your head.
Now don't get us wrong, winter in Boston is a beautiful thing, replete with outdoor ice-skating and idyllic hot-chocolate-sipping. But the best of winter is even better when you are properly attired.

The Musician's Guide to Avoiding Old-Timey Ailments: How To Not Get Rinderpest

Ahh, Rinderpest. The ancient scourge of cattle, domestic buffalo, and other even-toed ungulates. "But," we hear you say, "I'm a human." Well listen, even though this disease only affected animals, and was declared globally eradicated in 2011, there are still some valuable lessons we can apply to our lives.

1. Don't Lick the T. Okay, you probably wouldn't lick the T, that cozy train-space you share with 384,392 of your best friends on your daily commute. But if you think about it, holding onto the hand-rail or helping yourself into a seat and then eating with your bare hands is sort of akin to licking the doorknob. Rinderpest is spread through direct contact, and it doesn't get much more direct than saliva. We humans tend to hold onto things on the train to avoid falling over, unlike wildebeests who pretty much have it covered with four legs. So remember to wash your hands after riding the T, or after touching anything that seems particularly grimy, with soap and water.

Wildebeests don't need handrails.

2. Cover Your Cough. If there's one thing we know about Rinderpest, it's that it can rip through your nineteenth-century herd of longhorns like a warm knife through butter, and a large part of that is caused by air transmission. When you cough, it's best to do it into your elbow, where little Rinderpest particulate can't worm their way into the rest of the flock. Sneezing or coughing into your hand/hoof carries the risk that you will touch something else, or someone else, and spread the Rinderpest far and wide.

No, you guys, we just talked about this.

3. Don't Share Water. This little tip is also handy for avoiding other, less old-timey illnesses that tend to plague college students (some of which, like meningitis, are serious business). This is also where being human comes in handy, because, unlike antelope, we humans can mostly control our sources of potable water. Since human beings generally function better when hydrated, it's a good practice to start carrying around a reusable bottle with you; you can fill it up at the handy water fountains located all over the College of Fine Arts. And if someone asks you for water out of your own personal drinking vessel, just say "no thanks. I don't want to catch Rinderpest," and then give them the side-eye.

These practices will serve you well as you start the school year, particularly if you are moving from another geographical location, like a migrating giraffe. We all know that a new place means new germs, so although these three tips won't necessarily ensure that you won't get sick at all, they will pretty much guarantee that you won't get Rinderpest (although this is also thanks to Dr. Walter Plowright, who developed the vaccine).